Ron Jeremy is sexy!!!

Ick. Not really.

I know I've disappeared. My apologies. I've just been a little busy lately.

This past weekend was the South Florida Porn Convention. 2 hours and a hundred dollars later, I don't have an autograph on my boob to show for it. I am quite disappointed. I would have loved to have Ron Jeremy feel me up and sign my tit. He's a staple in the porno industry. Chubby, short, sweaty, hairy and unattractive, but a staple nonetheless. Oh, well. I'll have to settle for my very 80s porno VHS that has him on all fours servicing some woman with Farrah Fawcett hair. This doesn't appeal to me in the least, it's for sheer comedic value.

As much as I enjoy a good porn like the next guy, I just don't get it. I don't get why women would do that to themselves? How little do you have to think of yourself to get into that kind of industry? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for porn and prostitution (I think it should be legal), I just simply don't get it. Do they really enjoy it? Is it just a job? And I thought my job sucked.

More and more you hear about porn stars that were abused as children, or raped, and that's why they got into it. That I don't get, either. I hear the psychological profiles of abused women (either they don't want to be touched, or they turn into rampant whores) and I don't get the extremes? You would think if a woman got raped they would just retreat and never want to be touched again.. how is it that the opposite happens? Do they just think they deserve that kind of treatment?

On that note, I have to admit that I'm a little curious about Jenna Jameson's book. Having multiple sexual assaults and a fucked up family life made her have sex for money. Well, ok. Whatever floats your boat.

After all the damage is done and they've taken the prize for the most dick sucked in 2 days then they begin to look back at their lives and regret their decisions. All they want is a wife/husband, kids and a white picket fence. Well, isn't that sweet? So, you want to meet some man in the dry cleaners who won't mind bringing you home to meet mom & dad and tell them that you were once the girl who sucked the largest amount of penises in the US? And they are just supposed to accept that without any judgement? Who are you kidding? A few years ago Ron Jeremy did this sappy movie about himself where he boo-hooed the fact that all he wanted was a wife and family and couldn't find anyone outside the porn industry to date him. Well, hello?? Can you really blame them? Other than being deathly afraid of the size of your member, you've also had sex with half the world!! Who wants to be number 5676898955456?